


Homesick.

by reidbyers



Category: Criminal Minds
Genre: F/M, Reader-Insert
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-05-04
Updated: 2017-10-25
Packaged: 2018-10-28 00:26:22
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 2,605
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10819881
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/reidbyers/pseuds/reidbyers
Summary: You loved the life you created for yourself in America, the friends and family you have found were incredible but there was a part of you that missed your old home back in France; Spencer notices this and comes up with a plan to make you feel better.





	1. Chapter 1

You moved to America when you were twenty two years old, the fascination you’d had with the states was one that had stuck with you since you were a child. Perhaps it was because your mother had married an American and whenever he came back from visiting family he’d bring countless amounts of candy and toys, little american flags and postcards to amuse you. Your mother was french, barely spoke any English which was fine considering your father spoke French too, leaving you with good English but a heavy accent. It was a difficult adjustment from living in quaint French town to the busy streets of New York, you’d spent the first five years living with family, getting your degree and full citizenship before moving over to Virginia where you soon joined the FBI Academy.

After what felt like a forever of training, you were finally in the Behavioural Analysis Unit. After your first interview with Aaron Hotchner you were certain that you weren’t going to get the job, your english was slightly broken at times and you were even more certain that there were plenty of other, more qualified people for the job. It took three more interviews before he told you that you’d been accepted, then you got introduced to the team.

At first you had been nervous, they’d been working together for years now and you wondered how they would feel about some random newbie joining their team after it just being them but they were nothing but nice. The Technical Analyst had taken a shining to you immediately, from the day you walked into the office. Penelope had told you all about how she loved Europe and how badly she wanted to visit France; you reminded yourself that your accent gave you away and she wasn’t some crazy stalker. Though, with the skills she had she probably could be.

No one in the team made you feel weird or like the odd one out, especially Spencer. The resident genius could actually speak French and you enjoyed the conversations you could have together without anyone else knowing; that was of course until you learnt Emily could also speak French and had been listening in the whole time. It was even more embarrassing since the conversations had slowly developing into talking about your feelings for one another. You had often got partnered up together which meant long days spent in cramped cars or ricocheting ideas about unsubs, the partnership just seemed to work so well and you secretly thanked Hotch in your mind every time he paired you up with the handsome doctor.

You were surprised to learn that Spencer felt the same way, you thought that he saw your relationship was purely platonic but apparently not. He spilled his secret over a late night coffee at your apartment, sometimes you liked to watch awful movies together while laughing and critiquing them. You could tell he was nervous but you happily silenced his nerves with your lips, whispering a quiet “Mon chéri.” under your breathe after you moved back.

Everything was wonderful. You had the most beautiful man as your lover, a job that gratified you intensely and a friend group filled with wonderful, intelligent people who you loved very much; your life was perfect.

So why did you feel so homesick?

There was nothing particularly special about the town you grew up in. It was a tourist town, filled with pastel coloured houses and bunches of flowers along the river. You decided that because you’d spent most of your life there you’d become desensitized to everything there, your family even came over to America to visit you on occasion so while you missed them you knew they were only a phone call away. You decided that you missed how it used to be, not because anything was bad now but you just craved the familiarity.

Spencer eventually caught on to the fact that there was something wrong like he always did, sitting you down after dinner to discuss what was wrong.

“You’ve been distant recently, is there anything I can do to help?” You knew he was only asking because he hadn’t worked it out for himself yet, he was a fan of surprising you with solutions to your problems. With a sigh, you shrugged your shoulders and leant back in your chair.

“I’m not sure. I’ve been feeling really homesick lately, I don’t know why because I love it here and everything is wonderful but I just keep feeling these tugs towards home.” Even if you weren’t making total sense, Spencer would understand because that’s just who he was; emphatic to a fault.

“Homesickness is something we evolved into feeling, it was intended to stop humans from going into dangerous situations and instead stay put in a safe and familiar setting. Your brain is craving that familiarity.” Spencer explained as he stood up and started to clean away your plates, walking into the open kitchen and dumping the plates into the sink while still talking. “The feeling is outdated since in the modern age people move around all the time and find themselves in unfamiliar places; you moved across the world for example.”

“Yeah but I’ve been here years, Spence. Why did this not happen when I first got here?” You complained, standing up to go help him with the washing up. If there was anyone who could help you understand what you were feeling it was Spencer.

“It’s just your instinct, your brain is telling you that you want to go home when you might not actually want to. The Limbic System in our brain holds the responsibility of our sense of smell and our emotional memory so for example, if you’ve smelt something recently that reminded you of home, the senses are so close together that it triggers an emotional response.” Spencer handed you a washed plate and you started to dry it, leaning back against the counter with a somber look on your face.

You tried to think back on the past weeks and point out whatever it was that had made you feel like this, spring was just around the corner which meant flowers were starting to grow, especially on the route you took to work. Everything was becoming more colourful and it had reminded you of all the times you’d walk around Colmar, surrounded by history and colour. You remembered all the days you spent with your family in tiny pastry shops, digging through market stalls for hidden gems, begging your parents to take you on a canal down the river.

“I guess I’m just feeling sentimental.” You sighed, turning around to put the dried cutlery and planes away in the cupboard. Tentivally, Spencer stood beside you and took your hand into his, a motion that always made you feel better.

“You’ve had a long day, go get into your pajamas while I finish some work and then we’ll watch that show you like, okay?” Spencer’s voice consoled you, his suggestion sounded perfect right about now. You nodded your head and kissed him on the cheek before wandering out of the kitchen and to the bedroom.

Spencer watched after you until the bedroom door closed before taking his phone out of his pocket and dialed up Garcia.

“Hey Garcia, could you do me a favour?”

You didn’t wake up to the usual blaring of your alarm clock the next day, instead it was to Spencer’s hands gently rocking you awake. It was unusual for him to be awake before you, he liked to lie in whenever possible so instantly, you knew something was up. You groaned at the sunlight streaming in through the windows and peeked one eye open to look at your alarm clock, it was almost midday.

“Did my alarm clock break?” You mumbled into your pillow, cuddling back into the warmth of the blanket, you heard Spencer chuckle from above you.

“(Y/N) You need to get up.” You peeked an eye open again to look at him, it was a weekend so he was dressed a little more casually than normal. With no cases you were prepared for a few days of doing absolutely nothing; apparently Spencer did not have the same idea. You sighed dramatically and pulled yourself up, glaring up at Spencer.

“What have you done?” Your boyfriend might have been a profiler but so were you and that meant you could tell when he was behaving differently. It wasn’t that you didn’t trust him, rather surprises made you a little anxious. You knew he knew this and wouldn’t do anything that made you uncomfortable; so you decided to trust him. Spencer didn’t reply but instead helped you get out of bed before leading you out of the door. The sight of your living room was not one you were prepared for.

The whole room was covered in flowers, gorgeous purples and pinks lacing the room. There were so many, you didn’t know how he had managed to fit them all in yet alone bring them up the stairs into the apartment. It was just like springtime back home, the sight alone brought tears to your eyes. Spencer had put in all this effort just to make you feel a little more at home, you hoped he knew that your home was wherever he was.

“I know it’s not a lot, but my hopes are it will help for now.” Spencer said quietly from behind you, unsure if his plan would make things better or worse for you.

“It’s beautiful.” You whispered, turning around to face him before hugging him tightly, burying your face into his chest. Never had someone done something so remarkably thoughtful for you, it wasn’t a plane ticket home or a cure for your homesickness but it made you realise what a wonderful home you had for yourself here.

For as long as the two of you lived in that apartment, Spencer would buy you flowers to decorate the apartment with, not as many as the first time because it was difficult to move around and a vase or two had been smashed but enough to make you smile. His dark and dull apartment was filled with colour and life and it could not have been a better metaphor to what you did for his life.

 


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Just a little prequel that was requested on my blog sapphicpage!

The case could not have ended any better, you had managed to reach the unsub before he had the chance to hurt another woman and got to reunite her back with her fiance and child. There weren’t many cases that ended with such a happy ending and it left everyone on the team in a good mood, you all walked onto the plane with tired faces but still smiling.

You sat down next to Spencer who was making himself comfortable, crossing one leg over another and wiggling around on the seat until he found the perfect position. When he noticed you were sat beside him his face lit up, his brown eyes were filled with admiration and love. You had been dating for almost a month at this point and yet he still felt a sense of pride when you did such simple things like chose to sit next to him or be the first to get him a coffee on a long day.

“Ce que es tu lis?” (What are you reading?) You asked as you curled up on the seat, your legs underneath your and your head resting against your fist. Spencer glanced down at the book resting on the table in front of him and picked it up, running his thumb over the dog-eared cover.

“La Nausée par Jean-Paul Sartre, C'est un roman philosophique a propos d'un homme qui croit qui commence à ressentir la nostalgie mais ne sait pas ce que c'est et commence à remettre en question son existence en raison des choses qui l'entourent lui. (Nausea By Jean-Paul Sartre, it is a philosophical novel about a man who begins to feel nostalgia but don’t know what it is and begins to question his existence because of the things that surround him.) Spencer explained with a voice like honey, his accent perfect for someone who had never been to France before.

You nodded and glanced down at the book, reading the cover while Spencer continued to look at you, examining your features with such care and appreciation.

“Je ne peux pas attendre pour rentrer chez vous avec vous.” (I can’t wait to go home with you.) You spoke clearly, no one else on the plane to your knowledge could speak French as if they could it would have been revealed by now; you felt comfortable not whispering to Spencer since no one could understand what you were staying. Spencer smiled and looked to your hand which was resting on your lap, he so badly wanted to reach out and hold it but he knew no one knew about how you were dating yet.

“Pouvez-vous rester la nuit?” (Can you stay the night?) You looked up at Spencer and met his soft gaze, he looked hopeful and also a little after asking that question. It was clear what he was suggesting, you hadn’t spent the night together before and the thought of getting to sleep beside Spencer and then get to wake up to his blissful face; there was no question.

“Pour vous, je peux faire n'importe quoi” (For you I can do anything.) You tried not to sound as soft, worrying that if your words couldn’t give you away that your tone might. Spencer also tried to play it cool, giving you his signature tight lipped smile before turning his attention back to his book.

“Vous savez que je peux vous comprendre tous les deux, oui?” (You know I understand you both, Yes?) Emily’s voice made you jump, she was looking behind her at the two of you, a coy smirk and raised eyebrow. You knew Emily spoke plenty of languages but you had never assumed that French was one of them, she’d never showcased that talent before. A sudden sense of dread hit you as you wondered how long she had been listening, had she heard all the sweet stuff you had shared on other days?

All you could do was stare across at Emily, you’d only been on the team for a few months and you dreaded the idea of her maybe telling Hotch that you were dating a fellow agent, you knew the rules but also knew you were professional enough to not let it affect your work.

“English, anyone?” Morgan finally broke the French streak and looked between the three of you, waiting for someone to explain to him what on earth was being said.

“You guys should stop worrying about the case, we did good.” Emily said with a knowing smirk, you just nodded and looked down in your lap, thanking anyone and everyone you could think of for not letting Emily tell Morgan what had been going on. Spencer looked like he had seen a ghost, clearly embarrassed at what Emily had overheard from him.

“And rest up, I have a feeling you’ll need it.” Emily said before turning around, leaving you a hot, red mess and Spencer pale and trying desperately to focus on the book in front of him and not on what Emily had said. A few minutes past before you gained the courage to look up at him, biting nervously on your lip as Spencer too looked at you. No words were exchanged but you didn’t need them, even with two languages at your expense.

 


End file.
